For those who suffer from disordered eating, food anxiety triggered by the upcoming holiday season may be enough to make them want to pack bags and shack up somewhere warm for the coming months.
Halloween leads the festive three-month parade of family meals, social events, celebratory feasting, and for many, rationalized overindulgence. People struggling with eating disorders may agonize with how much to indulge, whether to abstain, how to self-regulate, and when to sit out of social events that could prove too pressured. Many clients report a fear of feeling judged or left out of rituals involving overconsumption, because their recovery requires them to follow a food plan and they’re not yet ready for intuitive eating. Some feel under a microscope in situations where struggles with fear foods cause stress and emotional distress.
As always, success in eating disorder recovery looks slightly different for everyone. We treat clients in early recovery who will challenge themselves with a fear food this Halloween. We also treat individuals for whom self-care may look like abstaining from sugar, and this choice may make them worry about sticking out like a sore thumb on special occasions. It is the mere acknowledgement of these experiences that prime you to take the first step in understanding how to reclaim holidays like Halloween, and make them personally meaningful, so you can enjoy them in a new and healthy way.
We always encourage clients to support and advocate for themselves in working through the fears and rigidity that have the potential to rob them of the joy of this special time of year. While food can be a bonding and culturally significant aspect of the holiday season, new rituals and traditions can be created that do not revolve around food and eating. Our dream for our clients is for them to participate fully in connecting activities and relationships, while operating free of food obsession. This may mean a period of time in new recovery in which additional supports are crafted, and boundaries drawn around what you think you can handle, in each step forward. Overconfidence can be as dangerous to new recovery as obsessive phobias can be.
Collaboratively with your therapist and dietician, create an individualized plan to help get you through each holiday. A wise person once said, “fail to plan, and plan to fail.” Identify members of your natural support system that you can utilize for check-ins when things seem particularly hard. Plan to use an app such as Recovery Record, or food journal and call it over to your sponsor or therapist on difficult days. Create your own non- food focused plans, such as a pumpkin carving party, a foliage hike in the woods, a spooky movie night, “boo-ing” friends, corn mazes, or hay-rides. Bring your own car to events, and know that you may leave early, if you feel uncomfortable. Have a “safe” word with a trusted friend, to use in case you’re feeling an urge to use symptoms or behaviors. You can celebrate Halloween in new ways that suit you, with compassion and understanding that you are choosing new paths, because you hold the power to prioritize your own comfort and listen to your body and mind.
Getting through Halloween may be difficult depending on where you are in your personal journey with food. This is just one day in the calendar, and however it goes for you, a new day will await you on November 1. Work at your own pace and focus on what feels right. Remember that with your commitment to your recovery, in time, the significance of food will fade into the background of the holiday season, and the emphasis will be entirely on sharing joy with those you love. Each holiday celebrated with self-respect will strengthen the quality of your recovery, and expand your range of coping skills and trust in your ability to self-care. As a rule of thumb, remember that all foods fit, in variety and moderation. Have fun, be safe and well, and have a Happy Halloween!
Written by Mary Dobson and Natasha Pawa.
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